What I Fantasize About…

I’m kind of laying down fantasizing about him right now, not some wild crazy fantasies. Just sweet kisses and touches. He’s the only man I ever enjoyed kissing. But the problem is, I done went and tried to be friends with him so now he likes me 😦 He’s attractive yeah, cool to hang around sure, great friend and all that but I dont like him like that….. It makes me sad that I have to choose between being his friend and being his lover.
I don’t want anything sexual right now, I want sensual affection. I want to be kissed and caressed, held and cuddled. I want him here with me. I don’t want to have to protect his feelings. I just want to kiss him like we used to every night. I want to lay next to him as I’m falling asleep. I want to see him lose control a little bit, I may even want his penis inside of me and that’s saying a lot.
Sir I don’t know how to let you know these feelings inside of me, probably isn’t even a good idea for you to know but I want you to come ravish me. I want to feel your soft lips against mine, matching perfectly the energy within me. I miss you 😦 How did things end up like this? Why can’t you be a hoe who doesn’t have feelings for me? Or me be the girl who falls in love with you? I just want you here with no regrets, no restrictions. You make me question my decision to be celibate. Is it really worth it? Are the reasons I keep telling myself actual things that I believe or am I making up stuff to be society’s idea of a good girl?
Lord have mercy on my soul, all I want to do is kiss you all night long.

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